Snippets Of Me

Help Me Believe

Friday, August 25, 2006

Thinking back on the past 3 years of my life, from the tender age of 15, it amazes me as to how everything was planned so well from the beginning, right to where You wanted me to be.

This whole journey sprouted its growth at one camp. All of its details I still remember vividly - how You've transformed me and given me reason to give You a chance.

It was the year two thousand and two around the time the year was coming to its close. I had dragged my reluctant mind, tired body and heavy bag to St. Patrick's hostel to redeem myself from loss time at catechism classes. In other words, I was at a remedial camp for failing to attend CC2 camp at the earlier part of the year and probably for writing a whole lot of jibberish on the test paper that determined my fate.

I hated class when I was Sec 1 and 2 because I didn't like how I was such an introvert and was too lazy to break out of that silence which, of course decided if I should go for class that Sunday morning. You might have guessed by now that I chose to stay home on numerous occassions rather than go for class. It was bad enough as it was that I spoke to no one during class, but with Francis constantly interrogating us about the very fundamentals of our faith was simply infuriating. No wonder I ponned class so often.

You can imagine how going for remedial camp really made my bones feel like they were made of stone as I literally dragged them to camp. Surprisingly though, I remember going with an open heart perhaps a desperate attempt to try and see the glass as half full instead of half empty.

So anyway, they had one activity that changed me forever. Sounds a little dramatic, but if you saw things through my perspective, I really wouldn't be where I am now. I wouldn't have woken up from that oblivion and wouldn't have changed the way I was living.

I'm too lazy to go into all the details, but it was like one thing led to another. From camp, to Maranatha to facilitating for camps and subsequently to Youth Council. The ease of walking on this road has increased in difficulty with each stage and quite frankly I've almost given up. But this memory of His love and my decision to walk this path is like Red Bull for my weary spirit. I just need to keep believing.

Rachel wrote in the pages of her life at 1:51 PM

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