Snippets Of Me

Diabetes Blog

Thursday, February 05, 2009

If there's anything that's been constant in my life, well at least over the last 10 years, it's my diabetes. Surely I could blog about other things that happen in my life. But to neglect the attention that my health should get every single day and talk about other things would just be a sort of pretense on my part.

Why the sudden enthusiasm to talk about it? I found many blogs online when I did a google search on people living with diabetes. Funny how God works it seems. I asked for a type of perseverance through the trials of dealing with this disease and He leads me to a blog that I found on the school's portal - the last medium I'd expect Him to use. Reading their daily trials with the disease gave me a spark of inspiration to shed light and attempt to be absolutely honest with my every day state of health. In other words, it's more for me to use the blog as my platform to be real about this and not have to hide behind a facade of being your average functioning human body.

The thing about diabetes is that it's not the bi monthly doctor's review on my health that's important, but rather the hour to hour blood sugar levels, the pre meal and post meal blood sugar levels. You might be able to imagine that it's unlike a book that you can start reading then leave it only to pick it up again in a few days. It's more like a newspaper. As long as there's tomorrow, there's something to write about.

What's prevented me from sharing so much about it on my blog has two factors. The first reason would be that I found it a real chore to have to explain all these terms. I don't share much about this very prominent part of my life with anyone, not even Mom who's been there all the while. It has become a sort of silencer that I've put on the disease. Not talking about it means not talking even to myself about what's going on with my body. I've forgotten on several occassions to give boluses after a snack and sometimes even after a meal! Hyperglycaemic nightmares!

I know many of the readers or ex-readers of this blog wouldn't know anything about what I would be ranting about, but I figured it's time that I not let that stand in my way. Much of what I would share would be very hard to relate to. Heck, at some point you might find that you don't fall into the target audience of readership. I don't expect you to be unless you're in the same boat, but you might find some relevance in the struggles that I face as do you in your own life. That said, if you do have a question about anything, I'd gladly answer them. That's what the tagboard's for. :)

The second reason for not sharing is because I am afraid. Not was afraid, but quite frankly, I am still afraid. It wasn't easy whenever I started a new phase of my life when I grew up with diabetes. Primary school was easy because my teachers and my classmates knew about it. When I started school in secondary school, what was on my mind most of the time wasn't whether I would be able to fit in, but what would I do if my friends found out. I did eventually share with them that I was living with it, but I'm still uncomfortable talking about it because I fear that they would feel awkward about it. Maranatha and Poly was no different. I think today only 2 or 3 people from Poly know about my condition. All these symptoms just points to one ailment. That I'm at a dis-ease about my disease.

I know sharing on my blog may not seem much since I'm not a celebrity blogger of sorts and have a small following of readers, but I believe in starting small. This is after all, a glimpse into my intimate horizons.

BTW, this blog was the one that inspired me.

Rachel wrote in the pages of her life at 4:57 PM

0Comments | Leave a snippet of you

0 Comments: